Isn't funny that if you look hard enough, you can find the most incredibly stupid things absolutely everywhere?

A case in point: Whilst lurking around Second Floor today, a guy I shall refer to as Joseph was reading his lecture notes for Environmental Politics. And he decided to share some of it, because it was just so amazingly stupid. And this stuff wasn't some student work, oh no, it was a freaking journal article. And, well, I'll just have to share some of it.

From Joseph's Environmental Politics Lecture Notes, in an article by Diana Day
Diana Day? That is just...wrong. You can't possibly make me believe that is her real name, either.
1. "Water is not included as the number one consideration. It is often sidelined as an add on. As in reliable cake mix."
What. The. Fuck. Not only is that quite possibly the worst metaphor I have come across ever, but it just does not make any sense, either grammatically or logically.
2. "The Policies often have remarkable lumpy and static characteristics like weed rafts in the Sargasso Sea."
Policies = Weed Rafts? Personally, I tend towards bullshit, but I can make an exception. Doesn't stop it from being absolutely horrific writing though.
3."Water politics as a vital research and inquiry base must be as attractive as a smelly fish at a dinner party."
Queen of Bad Analogies, I salute you.
4. "While 'sustainability' is becoming more persuasive and pervasive, who says it isn't just a little bit fraudulent. In the realm of mind control or poor little bilbies or feeling good while feeling profits."
So the first sentence isn't too bad. I dislike the persuasive/pervasive thing, and the "little bit fraudulent" reminds me of that TAC ad (little bit dead), but the second sentence. WHAT THE FREAKING HELL! What the fuck do bilbies, mind control or feeling good have to do with sustainability? And it doesn't make even the slightist bit of sense! I swear, I am going to print this line up and put it on my wall, just to remind myself I am not such a bad writer after all.

And on a slightly less absurd note:

- We had the auditions for Cafe International places over the weekend. Of the twenty-odd trying out, only eight will be shown on the night. And Cell Block Tango is one of them now! w00t!
So very yay for us, with our only three-quarters finished dance, and my solo section which I completely made up at the audition!
The Pro's of this: We totally rock! And I get to be on stage again! Yayness!
Cons: More practices which I will actually have to go to now.*groan*

- The Hat has been getting lots of good publicity at the moment - I even have random strangers in my Programming lecture complimenting me on it. Oh, my sweet hat. *Joins Wild Hat Love*

- Oh, and got my Psych report back. I got a H3 for it, which in bizarre Melbourne Uni speak means 65 - 69% - an average mark. When I first saw this, the little arrogant part of me was extremely insulted by this - I mean, I'm me, I don't do average marks. But then the more reasonable part pointed out that: a) Unlike school, I am not the only high-achieving type, and that pretty much everyone in the course must have done roughly as well as me; b) It's the first assessment of the first semester of the first year, of course I am not going to ace it; c) It doesn't particualrly matter in the long term; and d) I was way too lazy when I did the thing, so I probably deserved that mark.

- And we have another lab report, which shall be due in next Wednesday. Damn. At leaast I have the long weekend to do a bit of work on it.

- Got some new badges today (yay stalls in North Court!): The best one has this on it: "Coffee isn't helping. Get the jumper cables."

- Yet another Odd Soup today. It was some weird bright yellow soup, which quickly became referred to as Crayon Soup or Sponge-Bob Soup. Says all you need to know about it, really.

- Quote from dinner:
Tas: When my nipples are warm, I am warm. That's why I wear nipple socks!

- Random thing of the day: On the back of one of the toilet doors in Union House, there was a written debate about whether having seperate male and female toilets was oppressive or not. Riiight.

- Other Random thing of the day: "Cooking with the Undead"
Courtesy of Joseph. Make of it what you will.

From: [identity profile] ant-power.livejournal.com


Bilbies is just a stupid word anyway. In fact, there is nothing not stupid about bilbies whatsoever. They even look stupid, and they have no place in a journal article.

Also, nipple socks are an awesome idea.

From: [identity profile] drakyndra.livejournal.com


My dad might argue with you about the bilbies = stupid thing.

*Joins Coalition for the Formation of Nipple Socks*

From: [identity profile] aeque.livejournal.com


And with your "Cooking with the Undead" thing - I recently saw that there's an upcoming video game entitled "Stubbs the Zombie in: Rebel Without a Pulse"
laurenthemself: Rainbow rose with words 'love as thou wilt' below in white lettering (Default)

From: [personal profile] laurenthemself


That writing is appalling. *stabs Diana Day*

I think that the best reason for not having pansexual toilets was that girls shouldn't have to suffer the stinkiness of boys' toilets.
laurenthemself: Rainbow rose with words 'love as thou wilt' below in white lettering (Default)

From: [personal profile] laurenthemself


That and the fact that I really don't want to walk in to the toilets, pass the urinals where guys are taking a piss, and go into a cubicle. I'm sorry; I'm a one-penis woman, I do not feel any great need to see the various appendages of Melbourne University boys. Especially not while they're urinating.

From: [identity profile] melbournian.livejournal.com


I think pansexual sounds pretty good in theory.

And imagine having unisex toilets everywhere! *giggles*

From: [identity profile] drakyndra.livejournal.com


Hey, I live in college, and we have unisex toilets here, so I don't care either way. It's great - you get to see all the shirtless guys who have just had showers!

From: [identity profile] aeque.livejournal.com


What - you sit in the bathrooms waiting for guys to leave the shower, or do you just happen to walk past at the right times?

From: [identity profile] drakyndra.livejournal.com


Well, to get to the toilets, you have to go past the showers, which are also in the bathroom. And the rest is just coincidence. Coincidence, I tell you!

From: [identity profile] aeque.livejournal.com


Oh yeah - I meant to give you this joke:

A guy walks into a bar and orders 5 shots of vodka.

The bartender obliges, and the man downs them all except the last one, which he pours on his pants and puts the glass upside down on the bar.

He orders 5 more shots and does the same thing. This happens another 2 more times before the bartender asks him why he always pours out the last one on his pants and puts the glass down the wrong way.

The man says "Well it's an interesting story, you see when I was five years old, I realised I was velociraptor."

He then leaped over the bar and sliced open the bartenders abdomen to feed on his ripe entrails. The bartender yelled for help but his screams went unnoticed by the other patrons who tried in vain to flee the scene before the vicious raptor killed them. He soon died from the massive hemorrhaging caused by his wounds.

From: [identity profile] aeque.livejournal.com


By the way - what happens in Kafka's The Trial? Because I'm no longer sure that that's what my friends are in...

Anyway, here's their promotional poster: http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y150/jagall/81c63ecb.jpg

From: [identity profile] drakyndra.livejournal.com


The Trial isn't in the book I am doing - It's a novel, and I am doing a book of short stories. But from what I know, some guy gets pulled into court, and goes on trial for a crime he is never told about, and so he haas no idea if he has done it or not.
.

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