GOD YES. I prolly would've called the Marines if I saw something like that in my house. Or Chuck Norris. Or ninjas!
(omg. one time, like, 10 years ago, a squirrel got stuck in between my storm window and the regular window in my kitchen. since i was on the 3rd floor with no trees terribly close by, how it got there is a total mystery. anyway, it was sunday night, the ASPCA was closed and no one was answering their alleged emergency hotline, so i called the local NYPD precinct, and they laughed a lot. but then an hour or so later, the two greenest, most wide-eyed rookies showed up... IN RIOT GEAR. it was so awesome. sadly, mr. squirrel had already escaped on his own, leaving nothing but a small river of frightened squirrel pee at the bottom of the windowsill. hee.)
You totally need to construct a little popsicle-stick fort and mount the dead spider's lifeless corpse on a toothpick at the front, as a warning to other spiders who are plotting to invade your bedroom. This will be awesome and not at all insane. I promise.
Hm. According to Machiavelli, one must place one's strongest defenses at the area of one's kingdom which most closely borders the lands inhabited by one's most feared enemies.¹
Clearly this means you will need a separate tiny fort under all couches and beds, and in all dark pokey corners. >_>
¹ok. i totally made this up. i'm so ashamed. he said some stuff about fortresses that serve as a restraint to those who have designs upon your kingdom, and some stuff about creating safe refuges. i think. i will re-read sun tzu's art of war in the bathtub tomorrow and advise further. *snicker*
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OMG. Dude. That is WAAAY bigger than I was picturing. You might want to make sure that all small children and pets are accounted for. Srsly.
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(omg. one time, like, 10 years ago, a squirrel got stuck in between my storm window and the regular window in my kitchen. since i was on the 3rd floor with no trees terribly close by, how it got there is a total mystery. anyway, it was sunday night, the ASPCA was closed and no one was answering their alleged emergency hotline, so i called the local NYPD precinct, and they laughed a lot. but then an hour or so later, the two greenest, most wide-eyed rookies showed up... IN RIOT GEAR. it was so awesome. sadly, mr. squirrel had already escaped on his own, leaving nothing but a small river of frightened squirrel pee at the bottom of the windowsill. hee.)
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Best. Story. Ever!
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Clearly this means you will need a separate tiny fort under all couches and beds, and in all dark pokey corners. >_>
¹ok. i totally made this up. i'm so ashamed. he said some stuff about fortresses that serve as a restraint to those who have designs upon your kingdom, and some stuff about creating safe refuges. i think. i will re-read sun tzu's art of war in the bathtub tomorrow and advise further. *snicker*
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...Ew.
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You always get minions to do the icky jobs, anyway. Drawing and quartering = icky.
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